£500 to £2,500

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"Purple Cactus helped us make our event spectacular! With continuous support & a clear knowledge of their client base and a good understanding of our requirements enabled them to find us a perfect comedian at our event!" – Belfor


Simon Clayton

Simon’s former head of sixth form at Southgate School, Mr Massey wrote of him: ”Simon’s natural brightness often leads to disruptive high jinks during registration”. Simon Clayton has been a stand up comic since the summer of 1995.

On stage he talks about what he is: male, fat, mixed race, married, balding and anything else that currently makes him laugh. Although not necessarily in that order. He has performed nationwide with set sometimes an hour long. He is also a very experienced compere, and corporate entertainer.

He is a regular headliner and compere for both Jongleurs and the Comedy Store, and is now highly sought after through-out the comedy circuit.

A popular performer up and down the country, lads bible Loaded once famously described him as “like a bottle of HP sauce – fat, brown and fruity!”


Likeable fast thinking Londoner” – London Evening Standard

Very skilful stand up” – Time Out

Mr Clayton’s like a bottle of HP sauce, fat, brown and fruity” – Loaded

PRICE BAND: Bronze £500 to £2,500

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